Would you...

[Geowhizzer]

What the heck... 

1 ) Let a man give you a professional massage? - Ummm... no.
2) Get a manicure? - Why pay for something like that when I have my teeth?
3) What about a pedicure? No one would touch my size-15s anyway.
4) Eat a live 3" spider on a bet? No.
5) Do the entire guitar solo from "Hit Me With Your Best Shot" in an air-guitar contest to win $50? Can I sing it, too?
6) farg a really, really fat chick and then tell your buddies about it? No.
7) Piss on your neighbor's house at midnight? - No.  They have a doberman that could bite off mini-Geo.
8. Cheat on your wife/girlfriend for $10,000? - No.
9) Run over a dog with your car for $10,000? - No.  Cat. maybe.
10) Back stab a colleague at work to make yourself look better, if only one person knew it was you? No.
11) In exchange for enternal life would you have a tucan beak transplanted onto your face?  I don't need to do that. 
12) Would you eat a live kitten if you could go back to being 10 years old knowing everything you currently know? No.
13) Would you be in favor of instituting oral sex as a form of currency? 
14) If you were suspended in a tank of puke up to your neck and someone was gonna slam a caked sized load of shtein in your face would you duck into the puke or take the poop facial? I'd already have drowned in the puke because I would have spilled my own guts the moment I could mell it.15) What would you rather have installed in your crib....a batting cage or a bowling alley? Batting cage.
16.  drink your own urine for 500 bucks. Yes.
17.  Eat Placenta Those that say yes have never witnessed childbirth.
18.  Choose, shoot your mother or your significant other to save your life Neither.  Kill me.
19.  Let a dude wash your hair No.
20.  Work on a King crab fishing boat Sunds like fun - for a day.
21.  Let an effeminate man give you a blow job for $5,000 HELL NO.
22.  Bang a fat homeless chick or Jessica Alba's 2 day old corpse Neither.  I'm married.
23.  Would you accept the General Manager position for the Philadelphia Eagles at your current salary and with the stipulation that you have to tongue Lurie's ass for 5 solid minutes every work day? No.
24.  If you could guarantee one Philadelphia "major" sports team would win their championship the next year with the stipulation that the other 3 have to move to another city, would you accept?  Which team would get the title, and which would have to leave? Eagles win.
24a.  If you're a douche that doesn't root for all the Philly sports teams, would you accept an Eagles Super Bowl win if it meant all the players and coaches in all levels of all your other favorite teams were to spontaneously combust and go to hell? The rest all belong there anyway, in my opinion.
Quote from: Father Demon on Today at 10:28:52 AM
25. Take credit for a great thing at work (or in school for you youngins) even though you had nothing to do with it? I have to.  My bonus is based on reading scores, and I'm a history teacher.
26. Sell a gift your spouse/girlfriend gave you? No.  Return it if I must.
27. Stroke off a cop to get out of a ticket that would cause you to lose your license? No.
28. Post sex pictures of an ex g/f on the Internet to get even? No.
29. Waitress gives you the wrong bill for dinner and drinks -- $35 instead of $110. Pay and scram, or tell her?  Tell her.  I know, I'm a sap.
30. Threesome.  Two dudes and a chick. No.
31) Would you rather have a great, fantastic life and not remember any of it, or have a completely miserable, boring life and remember every detail? I'm a history teacher - what do you think?

[ice grillin you]

I won't even think about killing my mother or my woman, so you'll just have to deal.

flip a coin then

[Diomedes]

deal with the rejection tough guy

[PoopyfaceMcGee]

Let's delve into the brain of Dio:

$50 for an air guitar solo - No.
$500 to drink his own piss - Yes.

[SunMo]

$5,000 to let a dude blow him

[Diomedes]

I could go lower on that one.

[PoopyfaceMcGee]

I could go lower on that one.

BTW, due to all the responses being the same for my original question 23, let's change it as such:
Instead of your current salary, you make thrice your current salary.
Instead of 5 minutes in Lurie's cheerio, you have to give him 5 minutes in yours.

[Father Demon]

I could go lower on that one.

   

You were probably the only guy to tell the truth there.     

[rjs246]

Haha. Well I can be completely frank and let you all know that the reason I said no to the fat chick question is the same reason I said no to getting head from a twink. There's no chance I'm getting it up for either of them.

[hbionic]

farg that, i'd touch every one of you in your naughty places if it meant i got to bone alba.

In.

[hbionic]

Have a 69 with Jeff Garcia or Andy Reid. Neither is not an answer. You could be on top.

Become a woman, have sex with a guy and get pregnant and right before the baby is due, you lose the baby and you become a man again OR..... order a girlie drink and have your friends immediately laugh at you and call you a sissy bitch...and throughout the years when you guys get together...every now and then, one of your friends will bring that up and you'll get mad and punch him, but you'll help him up and you guys will all have a good laugh about it.

Have sex with a minor if no one would EVER find out. Even God (he was blinking). You could even bury the evidence.

Have a shot of sperm or a shot of really zesty tequila.

Get Herpes or Get genital warts?

Have sex with your retarded mother or gay brother?

Cut an inch off your penis off in order to free yourself from the tree/boulder you are pinned under or die under the tree/boulder?

Become Mexican or French?

Death by Fire or Death by Great White Shark?

Die at age 65 lead a conservative, law abiding, non-eventful, unwild, unremarkable, dreaming of farging chicks but won't because 'its not a clean life', kind of sleep walk through life in hopes of joining the lord when you die and find out there really is no god or Heaven OR be married at 16 for 75 years with the bitchiest, ugliest, heaviest, non-english speaking, whore of a wife, who will give you 5 kids who are whiny, unappreciative, disrespectful, fat, snotty-nosed, dirty, nose-picking-and-eating, ugly, majorly retarded, little farging kids, whose responsibility to bathe rest on you while every day you feel like killing your family and sticking a gun in your mouth when you wake up until you cry yourself to sleep but stop short because you believe in God and heaven.

Post like IGY or Freddie?

Which filter is more fun....Farg  or Shtein?

[Seabiscuit36]

You are really scary hector

[PoopyfaceMcGee]

Haha. Well I can be completely frank and let you all know that the reason I said no to the fat chick question is the same reason I said no to getting head from a twink. There's no chance I'm getting it up for either of them.

^^^real talk^^^