Grouphug

[PoopyfaceMcGee]

definitely rjs:

I keep having the urge to go around and stab people with a ceramic knife

I have a sudden urge to drop a load in my trousers!

T-Hawk, Sarge, or KoRn (where the hell has he been?):

I had sex with my dog, I was really horny.....it felt good. I did it three times....but then it died. I feel horrible now.

[Tomahawk]

KoRn is now known as Syracuse, FastFreddie. gthistle is now known as Zanshin.

[PoopyfaceMcGee]

KoRn is now known as Syracuse

Ah, that makes sense.  So, is he the one that banged his dog?

[General_Failure]

I'd put money on the guy with the great dane.

[hbionic]

If I was a dog, I think I'd be hanging around female boxers...they look like they have the cleanest and best looking vadges on a dog. Again, if I was a dog.

[Tomahawk]

Quantity over Quality, mofo. That's some sick shtein so I laughed.

[rjs246]

I support a football team in London that is currently performing extremely well and is actually one of the most exciting teams throughout Europe at the moment.

However, I do not like the manager of the club and as a result I am always whinging and criticising him, thus really annoying my fellow fans. I know it makes me look foolish but I just cannot help myself with my constant moaning. I think I need help really but cannot bring myself to admitting it to my fellow fans.

Thought this was appropriate.

[hbionic]

Quantity over Quality, mofo. That's some sick shtein so I laughed.

I bet you'll be keeping an eye out from now on. 

[rjs246]

Once, when I was a wee child-turd, I went to a barbecue buffet restaurant with my family. In line at the salad bar, I got the ever delightful chocolate pudding, and to my disdain, it just didn't seem to dispense sufficiently with a plain little spoon. So, to the horror of the elderly chap waiting to get some for himself, I sucked the excess off the spoon, and placed it back for he and all the other patrons to use. I saw his reaction and knew I'd done something rather grotesque, so I did what came natural. I smiled and walked away. That guy is probably dead now, too.

Awesome.

[rjs246]

There's one night a week - it's the only time i am happy......... my happy spot............ i love to sit in my room and stab my girlfriends cat. My friends call me the cat stabber. But don't think that it's wrong when she asks me to stab it and than feed it with my power drill. I love to listen to her scream!

[SunMo]

When i was in grade four i stole a girls wig, she had alepecia and was completely bald. I hid it and she couldent afford a new wig so she went bald for the rest of the year.

awesome.

[PoopyfaceMcGee]

So this chick was going down on me. She puked on my meatcicle, so I slapped her. She's been my girlfriend for five years.

I can't understand why someone would let Hilary Duff sing or act.

I would gladly kill her. Seriously.

I work in an ice-cream factory, i jerk off into the vats of flavors i dont like. Sorry all you coffee fans.

My friend's girlfriend is at my house right now because we are throwing a weekend long binge party for a friend of our's that is going into rehab, but she has this really annoying cell phone music clip/tone by this one hip-hop group, and I swear, if I hear that damn thing one more time, I'm going to farg her boyfriend, because he's really just a horny little English freak that has already offered to have sex with me while they were first going out.

Quality.

[SunMo]

   

I was having sex with a rather attractive black girl I had managed to pick up at a club one night, and I've always wanted to sleep with a black girl. So we're going at it and she starts dirty talking a little bit, so I oblige and return the dirty talk. At some point the dirt talk became racial and I called her, among other things, a 'black bitch', and she called me names like 'devil man', 'honkey' and even started saying 'yes massah'. It sounds strange but at the time it was quite erotic. Everything was going great until I called her Aunt Jemima, she stopped and looked at me, there was a moment of silence and then we both started laughing so hard that my stomach hurt. I lost my boner and although we slept together that night, she was gone in the morning and I never got another chance at nailing a black chick.
If I ever do I'm keeping my mouth shut.

sweet.

my husband thinks i'm a shopping addict and thats why we're £15000 in debt, he's standing by me. The money went to my unemployed lover who fathered our second child and it gets me so hot to think of him spending my loser hubbies money while my husband now has to work 5 years after he planned to retire to pay back the debt. janies been a bad girl

what a twat

[PoopyfaceMcGee]

what a twat

Yeah, that bitch is pretty much the biggest possible nightmare of a wife.


P.S.  Club selection is everything...

Once there was this squirrel that got into the attic in my parents house. My mom asked me to "take care of it and get it out, dead or alive". I got one of those sticky traps and the squirrel got stuck to it. I couldn't get it of, so I had to kill it. I used a golf club.I still feel bad about it, but it was the quickest way of doing it. I got it on the first shot.

I think I used the 3 iron.

[hbionic]

I'm a bitch when it comes to rodents. I don't like'em and probably will scream like a teenage girl when I see one.