the random musings not worthy of new thread thread

[MDS]

Way to be GF's bitch.

[SD_Eagle5]

The many facets of my gaseous emissions, October 13, 2006
Reviewer: FF (Raleigh/Durham, NC USA) - See all my reviews
One time my fart smelled like cake but tasted like eggs.

This comment was very helpful to me.

[The BIGSTUD]

Myspace.com is a piece of farging shtein. The one time I finally decide to use the site and on top of that, actually for something of moderate importance, all I get are a bunch of errors.

[PhillyPhreak54]

Anyone else having trouble with Comcast internet today?

Mine was out from 10a - 2p and now it comes on for like 15 minutes and then cuts off again. I called them and they said it was an outage in my neighborhood and throughout Chester Co. He put in a repair and said they don't need to come in the house because its out on the poles. But then says they can't come out until Wednesday. WTF?

[General_Failure]

Mine went out the other night during that storm. Since then it's been fine. I may even pay it this month, it's been so good.

[PhillyPhreak54]

Mine has been excellent lately. No probs until today. Thankfully I got my FFL lineups in last night or else I'd been farged and even more pissed than I am now.

[Geowhizzer]

From today's News of the Weird:

Fine Points of Pennsylvania Law
(1) A superior court judge in Reading, Pa., overruled a county court judge in August and declared that Miller Genuine Draft is, indeed, an actual beer. (The county judge had said that the prosecutor had failed to show that MGD was on the state beer list, but the superior court judge said there was other evidence that MGD is beer.) (2) In Carlisle, Pa., Derek Randall Pittman, with a .237 blood-alcohol reading, was ticketed for drunk driving, even though he said that all he did was hold the steering wheel momentarily while his friend in the driver's seat took a bite from his sandwich. However, that was enough to be "operating" the car, said a judge at a hearing in August. [WCAU-TV (Philadelphia), 8- 2-06] [Patriot News (Harrisburg, Pa.), 8-2-06

[Drunkmasterflex]

If that dude had a .237 how the hell would he remember why he was holding the steering wheel.  Anyway that is quite hilarious.

Oh, I have the misfortune of moving in with a Cowboy's fan today. 

[Diomedes]

Oh, I have the misfortune of moving in with a Cowboy's fan today.

Be careful.  When you hang with dogs, you get fleas.

[Diomedes]

I am positively in love with the gmail calendar feature.  My old lady and I share calendars, which makes keeping track of things much, much simpler.  Whenever I look at my calender, I see my appointments/birthdays/etc. in one color, hers in another.  Sweet.  I'ved added a couple public calendars as well: US Holidays and the Philadelphia Eagles game schedule.  Double sweet.

[Sgt PSN]

Now if Google can only come up with a way to prevent you from losing your checkbook..............

[hbionic]

...or from saying stupid things like "okie dokie"...and stuff.

[MDS]

Isn't fun to be in between the two guys with diarehha when you're taking a shtein in the bathroom of Tuttleman?

[PhillyPhreak54]

Check this bullshtein out...

So on Saturday I go to work. My cousin (18y/o) is here at the house. He's staying here because most of our family lives down the shore most of the year and the house is empty except for me so I stay here and take care of the place for my grandfather. Anyway, my cousin has been known to have sticky fingers. Stuff has come up missing and nothing ever did until he came around. For instance, I've had some cash go missing over the last few months. Nothing big but still. I couldn't prove anything and I didn't want to start accusing him and be wrong. Maybe I lost the $40 when I was drunk? But then the Gamecube I bought my sister to play with when she stops by goes missing. I bought her a game for her birthday and when she goes to play it the thing is gone. WTF? Of course everyone suspected it was him but again - no real proof. But no one else would've taken it.

So on Saturday I go to work. I tell my friend at work that I hope all of my stuff is there at home when I get there because of my cousin being a goddamn thief. Just joking, right?

Wrong.

The first thing I notice is that my PS2, all my PS2 games, controllers and my Rocky DVD box set is missing. That is over $500 worth of shtein!

I came into my room and noticed because it was really hard not to. He tried to be slick and replace everything on the entertainment center like it hadn't been touched except for the fact that there is a BIG HOLE WHERE THE PS2 used to be. Yeah, I'm not going to notice that.

And then I look at where the DVDs and games were and low and behold - a big gap. So I go into his room, kick the bed and scare the shtein out of him and say "Yo icehole, what the farg? Where's my shtein?" He replies "I didn't take it". So I'm going off and briefly considered beating the shtein out of him. The only reason I chose not to is because he'd likely file charges on me. I like not being in jail and I like being employed.

So he continues to deny it. But there was no one else in town who would be in this house. There was nothing taken from anywhere else in the house and like I said - everything was replaced neatly in my bedroom hoping that I wouldn't notice. I know he did it. Everyone in my family, even my aunt (his mom) knows he did it. But dude is still denying it.

I gave him 3 options; Get my stuff back, pay me or I call the cops. I was going to call the police on Saturday night but have not done so yet. I spoke to a good friend who is a cop who said that it is a midemeanor 1 but still carries jail time. I confronted my cousin again last night and he denied it again. I told him to get his shtein and get out I didn't care if he doesn't have anywhere else to go.

How would you guys handle this? Beating the shtein out of him, although it crosses my mind every several seconds, is not an option.

[General_Failure]

Kick him out, keep anything he has there. Change your locks.