the random musings not worthy of new thread thread

[Seabiscuit36]

They're ok if you know that your basically going to blow a ton of money on drinks and dances, plus girls that just go around.  On a side note i went to Oasis back in december and got pickpocketed by one of the girls.  Always put your wallet in your side pockets. 

[Diomedes]

I'm not interested in blowing a ton of money on chicks unless two of them are going to spend three hours with me tied in slippery knots, trying to break the record for orgasms in one session.  And I don't have the kind of money that takes, so I'll just keep saving for it.

[Rome]

Most strip clubs are hideous.  One glaring exception is Mons Venus in Tampa.

The girls in that place are so ridiculously hot and fresh-looking, it's mind-blowing.  I'm not exaggerating either.

Check it out the next time you're in Tampa.  It's right up the street from Raymond James Stadium & Legends Field.

[Sgt PSN]

Whenever I go to a strip club, I always try and sit right next to a group of guys that are blowing insane amounts of cash on lap dances.  I get a great close up of t & a all night without the inconvenience of paying for it, which leaves more money in pocket to buy over priced drinks.  w00t!

[Rome]

Going into strip clubs with liquor licenses is for suckers.  Not only do you get reamed by the broads dancing, you have to pay insane amounts of cash for booze.

BYOB clubs are the best because (1) you can bring your own shtein in, and (2) you don't have to wait for crackhead skanks to get around to serving you.

[Sgt PSN]

True, but I don't drink much beer these days and the last club I went to like that only allowed you to bring beer, no hard liquor.  Also, where I'm at right now doesn't have any byob clubs.  Even when I lived in KC, the closest byob club was about an hour away. 

[Seabiscuit36]

Fill beer cans up with liquor sarge

[Father Demon]

So my oldest son has five mice as pets.  My daughter, who is two, likes to watch them, pet them when they are in their cage, and occasionally hold them when either me or Mrs. Demon are with her.  Well, actually only me, because Mrs. is very, very afraid of them.

The other night, my daughter was watching the mice, and somehow opened the cage door and walked away.  We didn't find out until yesterday morning when my oldest son, on his way to the bathroom, saw a mouse sitting in the middle of the rec room floor.  We were able to catch two of them in the morning, and one stayed in the cage.  My boy thinks he must be the "good mouse" when I'm convinced it must be retarded.  So anyway, there are two mice loose in the house.  I told my boy I was going to have to buy traps, and his face got white with that deer in the headlights look staring at me, mouth agape.  Not wanting to break the necks of his pets, we agreed to get the humane traps for them. 

Those little bastiches ate the peanut butter off the front of each trap we set, but didn't go inside.  So, I am giving it 24 more hours to catch them.  If not, it's either broken necks or stickly paper, and hopefully he never finds out. 

I saw one this morning scurry across the baseboard, so they are just toying with me.  Soon, they find out that the Great White Hunter myth is a scary truth.

[Diomedes]

There are mice living in the ceiling above my apartment/floor below my landlord.  I can hear them scurrying around and squealing at each other.  My cat catches one every six weeks or so.

Not much I can do about it but count the days until I move. 

[Father Demon]

One more caught, one more to go.

I was on a conference call, and heard my wife shriek. 

Me:  "I gotta go." 

Hope I have a job now...   

[Susquehanna Birder]

Get a snake.

[Diomedes]

Caught alive?  Or caught killed?

[Father Demon]

Caught alive.  He was hiding out in the pantry when she saw him.  We had to chase him down with a broom from behind the stove because he escaped my fool-proof plan to "just catch him with my hands."

I went in to grab him, he jumped on my hands, I shrieked like a little girl, and he ran under the stove.  Once my wits were back about me, I cornered him with a cup.  A St. Louis Blues Manny Legace cup.  One of the few saves he made this year.

[Diomedes]

A St. Louis Blues Manny Legace cup.  One of the few saves he made this year.

Have you no shame?

[Father Demon]

Very little.