Vandalism, Pranks and Fun

[reese125]

Some of the worst shtein I did went to my great grandmother who was 93 and basically losing her mind. My mom brought her in to our home because my grandmother couldnt take the constant, and I mean constant complaining from her anymore. So instead of the old folks home, my mom took her in.

Picture a 240lb italian woman who sat in the same sofa chair every day all day, picking at the hair on her upper lip and truly despised showering. Just some of shtein we pulled were:

--We constantly put boogers in her Mcdonalds french fries as we watched her thoroughly enjoy each bite.
--We set up stereo speakers to her ears when she was sleeping and blasted Motley Crue to watch her freak her out and call for gods help.
--She couldnt walk down the stairs in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, so she used to squat down and pee in a big black bucket. Sad part is my brother and I were right next to her room and we would hear that piss sound every friggin night. One night we couldnt take it anymore and decided to not only cover that bucket with saran wrap, but chuck GI Joes and wiffle balls at her until she fell over crying.

I love you gram. Im going to hell I know.

[lurking wierdo]

Some of the worst shtein I did went to my great grandmother who was 93 and basically losing her mind. My mom brought her in to our home because my grandmother couldnt take the constant, and I mean constant complaining from her anymore. So instead of the old folks home, my mom took her in.

Picture a 240lb italian woman who sat in the same sofa chair every day all day, picking at the hair on her upper lip and truly despised showering. Just some of shtein we pulled were:

--We constantly put boogers in her Mcdonalds french fries as we watched her thoroughly enjoy each bite.
--We set up stereo speakers to her ears when she was sleeping and blasted Motley Crue to watch her freak her out and call for gods help.
--She couldnt walk down the stairs in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, so she used to squat down and pee in a big black bucket. Sad part is my brother and I were right next to her room and we would hear that piss sound every friggin night. One night we couldnt take it anymore and decided to not only cover that bucket with saran wrap, but chuck GI Joes and wiffle balls at her until she fell over crying.

I love you gram. Im going to hell I know.

You may be the most despicable person on earth.

[Tomahawk]

2nd most despicable person on this board maybe

[Diomedes]

I love you gram. Im going to hell I know.

lol, kids are awesome/terrible.

[reese125]

this was my way of telling god Im sorry.

thank you CF.

[Diomedes]

we have a thread specifically for religion, David.  go prostrate yourself there.

[reese125]

ha--I wish I believed, but I was told to tell him that just in case.

[PhillyPhanInDC]

We used to tie decently heavy fishing line to the knockers on people's doors at night, around 9 or so.. We would then walk the line out away from the house, and hide behind a bush or a car. We'd pull the line and make the knocker knock twice or three times, then let the line go completely slack. People would answer the door, see no one there, and close it. On the second or third time, they'd sure enough stick their head out to look around for the punks doing knock knock zoom, and at that point we'd pull the string as hard as we could, slamming their head/hand in the door, then run like hell. Sometimes the person would walk out of the house, and we'd slam the door so farging hard they'd jump out of their skin.

We also caught shtein loads of frogs in a pond not far from our house, and dumped them in a neighbor's pool the night before they were having a pool party for their bitch daughter's sweet sixteen. Probably 20-30 good sized bull frogs.

We used to mass gigantic piles of trash in front of peoples houses, basically go through a cult-de-sac and amass all the trash people had put out, and then dump it all in one big pile of one of the houses, sometimes directly behind the driveway.

[lurking wierdo]

That's just good clean fun. Today, people would be blaming the parents and putting the kids in therapy to "talk about their feelings".

[Don Ho]

This is my current favorite:

At Christmas time, while at the mall with my wife I will carry bags out to my car and just sit in the car with the backup lights on for like 30 minutes.

I do this. Thought it was funny when I was a teenager, and even funnier now that I'm an adult.

Me and my cousin used to throw snowballs at cars

This was a big favorite of mine

We used to play knock knock zoom all the time. Often times we'd leave random stuff on the patio.

Not much snow in Hawaii growing up so it was fruit from neighbors trees - limes, mangoes even footballs and volleyballs.  We'd hang out at the corner and peg cars all night.  We'd actually keep score like QB passer rating.  My freshmen year in college at Univ of New Hampshire we use to sit out by the dorms, make a pile of snowballs after a nice snowfall and just drill cars going by.  Guys would pull up chairs with a 6 pack, a bag of pretzels and watch like they were at a sporting event.  Best part was you'd occasionally hit a car that was being driven by a friend.  "Oops, our bad".

You're so right SD, it was funny then and it's even funnier now. 

[Eagaholic]

The first concert I ever went to was at the Spectrum with my buddy Jon and my sister. We took the train to the Reading terminal and went to the McDonalds a few doors down on Market Street. There was this cop standing in the back watching over the place. Not some rental security guy, he was a big ugly Philly cop during the Republic of Rizzo era, and generally you were best off not even making eye contact, especially if you came well equipped for a Spectrum concert.

However all three of us had significant, almost pathological, authority issues. We decided to take the table a few feet in front of the cop and see what would happen.

Less than a half a burger into eating, my sister draws milkshake up into the straw and releasing it spells out "I HATE PIGS"  across the middle of the table in 8 inch vanilla white letters. She had the whole thing written before the cop saw it. (Note to youngins of the board - 'pigs' was derogatory slang for a duly sworn officer of the law).

The cop bellows out "HEY WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!" And my sister looks him right in the eye and says "it just spilled out like that."

We had numerous instances of run ins with police folk ranging from fairly mild... like during a snowball fight, a Philly police van comes screaming lights and sirens down the street. I obviously get a free pot shot whaling a well packed iceball against the van's driverside window because it's an emergency and they can't stop, right? Wrong)...  to more extreme stuff which I probably won't post because people won't believe it. On a side note, I am a firm believer in guardian angels.

But the irony is my sister has been a Miami cop for well over 20 years now, and I sometimes go down and ride with her for the day. At one point as a teen I got caught doing some shtein, so my parents made me choose something to pay society back. I volunteered for a few years with the local paramedic ambulance squad and doing so I got to be friends with a number of cops and firefighters. Funny how things turn out.

[Don Ho]

Good job holic.  My mother is still in denial about all the shtein my brother and I did with the neighborhood kids.