the random musings not worthy of new thread thread

[rjs246]

I'll cover your skull with protoplasm. Lightning bugs turn pink on my tongue, catch a spasm.

[Yeti]

HA! 37 farging pounds?! Did he die of pride afterwards?

[shorebird]

A bus full of Catholic school girls wrecked and killed everyone in the bus. At the pearly gates the girls all lined up. St. Peter asked the first girl, "Tiffany, have you ever touched a male sex organ before?" "Well", she said, "I once touched one with the end of my index finger." "Very well", said St. Peter, "put you finger in the holy water and pass."

He asked the next girl, "Laura, have you ever touched a male sex organ before?" "Yes," said Laura, "I've stroked one with my right hand before." "Very well", said St. Peter. "Put your whole hand in the holy water and pass."

All of a sudden there was commotion from the back of the line. "What is going on back there?" asked St. Peter. Tracy came to the front of the line and said, "If I'm going to have to gargle with this holy water, I want to do it before Angie puts her ass in it!"

[rjs246]

People think I'm mixed with shark, drinking gasoline.

[phattymatty]

Transvestites and people watch space parasites

[Father Demon]

Goes here?

Who will accept Jose Canseco's dumb challenge? Vai Sikahema

Jose Canseco, because things are going so well for him these days, has been looking for someone to go toe-to-toe with him in a celebrity (and I use that term very, very loosely) boxing match. He had recently been offering $5,000 to get someone to accept the challenge, and for a while, everyone, as they usually do, completely ignored Jose Canseco.

But a brave hero has finally stepped up so that this stupid fight may finally take place. And that hero is former Philadelphia Eagles return man Vai Sikahema. What a relief that must be for the millions of you who sit around all day and wistfully think, "Man, when is Jose Canseco going to fight Vai Sikahema?!"

Canseco claims that he's earned black belts in Kung fu, Taekwondo, and Muay Thai. I'd love to doubt him (and I sort of do), but the man does have a certain track record for telling the truth. He's also going to have a considerable height and weight advantage over Sikahema.

As for Sikahema's qualifcations, he grew up wanting to be a professional boxer, and he fought in a National Golden Gloves Championship that would eventually be won by a fellow named Sugar Ray Leonard. That explains the goal-post punching celebration you see above (they do look like quality punches).

More recently, he's been staying in shape by anchoring at NBC-10 in Philadelphia and going shopping with Johnny Weir. I hear that's Floyd Mayweather's secret, too.

The fight is scheduled for July 12th in Atlantic City. I will consider watching it if the promoters call me and offer me $49.95 to do so.

Vai taking out the goalposts

[mussa]

Transvestites and people watch space parasites

are you guys singing one of munson's geek rap songs?

[ice grillin you]

nothing earth shattering but i found this interesting

most mobile homes per state

[rjs246]

Transvestites and people watch space parasites

are you guys singing one of munson's geek rap songs?

Kurt Cobain and Roger from Zapp.

[Seabiscuit36]

[Father Demon]

Somebody had to do it...  I'm kind of embarrassed it wasn't me:

Chickipedia.com

[Seabiscuit36]

nothing earth shattering but i found this interesting

most mobile homes per state

im really surprised Maryland is that far down the list. 

[Seabiscuit36]

Somebody had to do it...  I'm kind of embarrassed it wasn't me:

Chickipedia.com

i love this girl  http://www.chickipedia.com/Lexi_Belle

[phattymatty]

anderson cooper is a mo.  never knew that.

[Seabiscuit36]

with a name like that, is it a surprise he turned out that way..nttiawwt