Name: ILLEAGLE (if you don't get it you're weak

)
Real name: John
Location: Scranton, Pa (7th circle of hell)
Why I'm here: Unhealthy obsession with the Eagles, and people on this board realize there is more to life than your farging post count.
Comments: I look back to when I was 6 years old and the only things in my life that have remained are my family and the Eagles. I started playing football at 6 but gave it up when I was 15 because I was given the chance to be the vocalist of a hardcore band called R.S.B. We progressed quickly and by the age of 18 we were on the east coast leg of a tour of 2 bands, All Out War (NYC), Cold As Life (Det.). Now it's over because when you rely on other humans for anything, you will lose. Now I see my friends bands playing the Ozzfest and Warped Tour. But oh well. In the last 3 years I've lived in Allentown Pa, Scranton Pa, New Haven Ct, Lakeland Fl, & Birmingham Al. I enjoy very little about life (i love vicodin

), and I trust nothing that moves. I will destroy anyone at NHL Faceoff 98-01 on PS1. I see nothing but evil everywhere I turn, but being constantly at war with it I find myself alert and on point. I'm not into dolphin sex, I prefer sex with otters. They're way more cute. My eyes are always fixated on the sky. There is an asteroid coming. I don't know when, but I know it's coming. If I play my cards well, I will be in the right place at the right time and it will land on my face. Depression is a bitch.
P.S. Screw the children. If given the chance to grow, they will turn into polluted, evil humans. Kill them while they're young and pure. That way they'll be accepted into Heaven.