Ask Yeti

[hbionic]

I thought the dug the long ball...and huge dongs?

[Sgt PSN]

Dear Yeti,

What's the best way to get my girlfriend to invite another girl into bed with you?

Thanks.

Try offering a million dollars...cause chicks dig dudes with money man.

[Yeti]

Dear Yeti,

What's the best way to get my girlfriend to invite another girl into bed with you?

Thanks.

I'll assume you meant you and not me. 

Alcohol.  Pure and simple.  And none for you, stupid.

Thanks for the question.
 

[PhillyPhreak54]

Dear Yeti,

Why are women such bad drivers?

[Yeti]

Dear Yeti,

Why are women such bad drivers?

Because cars were designed for men.  Women would be great drivers if the pedals were on the ceiling.

Thanks for the question.

[PhillyPhanInDC]

Yeti,

My boss is a farg. Kill?

Hugs and kisses.

[hbionic]

Dear Yeti,

*farg, Marry, Kill?...if you were the last 4 men left in the woods:

T-Hawk
Sarge
Big Brother

also, in a different camping trip

Rosie O'Donell
MDS
Lurking Weirdo

*Dio would somehow be available to help you dig a ditch and marry you and the lucky one.

Thanks.

[Diomedes]

I'm uniquely qualified to do both, and it would be an honor.

[Yeti]

Yeti,

My boss is a farg. Kill?

Hugs and kisses.

No Boss is worth jail time so no.  The answer is no.  Andy Reid however, is a different story.

Thanks for the question.

Dear Yeti,

*farg, Marry, Kill?...if you were the last 4 men left in the woods:

T-Hawk
Sarge
Big Brother

also, in a different camping trip

Rosie O'Donell
MDS
Lurking Weirdo

*Dio would somehow be available to help you dig a ditch and marry you and the lucky one.

Thanks.

Hbionic, this scenario should be with women so I can only answer accordingly.

Farg MDS
Marry Lurking Weirdo
Kill Rosie O'Donell


Thanks for the questions.

[hbionic]

To: Yeti
Cc: Gloria Allred

Re: "Ask Yeti Terms and Conditions"

Dear Yeti,

It is with great regret that I type this letter to remind you of your legal responsibilities regarding Concretefield.info and all of its content including binding terms and conditions of the 'Ask Yeti' thread. Section 13 1(a) states that, "Any and all reasonable questions will be answered to the best extent of questionee's (questionee shall be known as 'Yeti') knowledge and it is strictly prohibited to avoid/deny/modify/and or ignore any reasonable questions fielded by questionor (questionor shall be known as 'hbionic') in order to avert revealing facts about questionee's sexual preferences. Any 'reasonable' questions shall include, but not limited to: F/Marry/Kill's, What's the best way to act dead when my stepfather comes home drunk and horny and I'm the only one home, How to make the perfect strawberry lemonade, and anything regarding dogs, bikes, and monkeys driving cars. Fines up to $500,000 and/or 2-Years in Federal farg Me In The Ass Prison will be imposed for failure to answer any reasonable questions.

Yeti, I'm sorry, you're a great guy, and your wife is a great shag, but we need to know:

F/Marry/Kill- T-Hawk, Sarge, Big Brother

If I were you, I'd consult your attorney, but it looks like you are binded by the conditions you signed up for when creating this thread. Ignorace of the law is not an excuse. I will give you 24 hours to respond, if not my attorney will persue this matter in court and you can bet your sweet ass I'm taking your wife, your cabin, and a mold of your huge dong with me.

Regards,

hbionic

[Yeti]

I'm not intimidated by your west coast legal mumbo jumbo.  I believe someone needs to serve me legal papers correct?

lol.

Next question please.

[Tomahawk]

Dear Yeti:

If I punched myself in the face as hard as I could, would the world end immediately or would it take a few moments for the binding fabric of the universe to disintegrate?

[reese125]

Dear Yeti-

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Thanks for your feedback.

Reese

[Yeti]

Dear Yeti:

If I punched myself in the face as hard as I could, would the world end immediately or would it take a few moments for the binding fabric of the universe to disintegrate?

It would be immediate.  Please hold off until the Eagles win a Superbowl.  Or Todd gets laid.  Whichever comes first.

On second thought it looks like both are impossible so punch when ready.

Thanks for your question

Dear Yeti-

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Thanks for your feedback.

Reese

This is actually a really good question.

I like to drink and drive.  When I am so torched I can't see straight I learned braille so I can still take money out to drink more.  I'm sure I'm not the only one.  Right Rusty?

Thanks for your questions.

[hbionic]

Dear Yeti,

If you had to decide between having sex with a sasquatch or another yeti, which would you choose?

Thanks.