On another OT board I occasionally visit, a guy came on today and posted the following (I have removed some proper nouns to protect myself from you fruits coming over there):
QuoteI'm retiring from this forum.
So, why you may ask?
Few simple things.
First and foremost.... I apologize to everyone on this board, mainly the people that run the board (Neil, Scott etc) for some of the trouble, trolling and likewise that I caused over the past couple years. I also would like to apologize to the people who I've met on here and become sort of "net" friends with here on <<mb nickname>>. I think what changed over the weekend was basically the sermon I heard at church this weekend.
Now before you go disregarding me leaving based on "religious" grounds just hear me out on this. What I felt after I heard the message this weekend was that I need to let go of the things that hold me back or that associate with a previous lifestyle, way of thinking etc. Now, since I'm basically confessing and owning up to what I've done, said, acted, wife, not wife, stories etc I might as well lay everything on the line (since I know my credibility at this point is shot and honestly, that's fine with me).
- Never owned an <<model vehicle represented by forum>>
- Made up story about <<modding one car to be more like another>>
- Never owned the <<old school luxury performance car that fixing up gave 'street cred'>>
- Yes posted fake pics of the wife to gain somewhat of a "cool" rank on an internet forum (lame I know)
- Work @ Intel but not for Intel [see contractor] (6 figures? Ha I'm wishful bitch)
- As far as I know, <<username>> isn't ghey.
So those things being said, I think I felt like I was juggling so many lies on this internet forum that I just couldn't bear trying to make more and complicate them. I think one thing that I enjoyed was my post about the <<forum nickname>> Mac'n'Cheese and also the Autoshow pics. That's the real me, that's what I'm like. I guess that's the thing with me, is I realized if I continue to BS you guys and make myself look good, that is not honoring to God and quite frankly, that is a waste of your guys' time, my time and God's time. Those being said.....
Second. I think <<forum nickname>> has changed quite a bit over the past 2-4 years that I've been on the board(s). I think it's become a dumping ground for people's arrogance, flaunting their new toys and ultimately a place to prove self worth. The irony of that... I bought into that and was trying to do that for the past couple years.... Try to keep up with that trend. Quite frankly, I find it to be bullshtein and it's left a sour taste in my mouth. One thing that I think I'd do if I came back to <<forum nickname>> in the future is keep some of the bags at the door so to speak. I think there's something's that is appropriate to the internet and other things that aren't. However, the more I think about it, <<forum nickname>> is more like a Seinfield episode more than anything. This is just my general impression of <<forum nickname>>, not everyone is like this and quite frankly I'm glad that everyone isn't like what I mentioned above.
Lastly,
I'm going truly to miss some of you guys. <<a bunch of user names>>. All of you guys I've enjoyed getting to know over the past year really. Sure there's been shtein thrown on each side but hey, that's what makes people have a personality right? ?
So with that said.... My exit is my introduction to you, <<forum nickname>>:
My name is Aaron <<last name>>, I'm 24 years old, have two Subaru's, a '05 2.5RS Wagon and an '05 LegacyGT in Satin White Pearl. I got married in April to my wife Catherine. I'm currently working as a contractor @ Intel; Feb. will mark my 2nd year working on-site @ Intel. Catherine works @ Northwest Medical Teams (you might have heard about them helping with the Hurricane Kitrina relief effort) and has been there for about a year and a half.
So with that <<forum nickname>>.....
See ya around.
-Aaron-
I just wanted to share, because his post made me laugh. Then, some of of the responses made me laugh even harder. So, my question is this... Why are people drama queens like this? I never want to see any shtein like this on CF.
P.S. If you want the link so you can read the responses, PM me. I'll consider your request. There's some funny ish.
you trying to protect the identity of the board and saying that youll 'consider' giving people the name of it via PM is far gayer than anything in that cats post
Arrogant twat.
That's one of the funniest and lamest things I've ever read. Now if only stilloncrack would come clean over here so we could all move on. :-D
You see. This is why I will never understand people who take message boards so goddamned seriously. This freak is having a crisis over lies he told on a message board to complete strangers. What a farging idiot.
Quote from: ice grillin you on January 30, 2006, 01:02:46 PM
you trying to protect the identity of the board and saying that youll 'consider' giving people the name of it via PM is far gayer than anything in that cats post
I just don't want you over there. I get plenty of IGY on CF.
<insert gay joke here>
it took me 10 seconds to find the board.
You might as well post a link, Wingnut. FF will love him sum u.
retard spend too much time thinking about people on a message board.
hell if any of the 2 or 3 boards i posted on ceased to exist, i dont think i'd really care. some people take this stuff way way to seriously.
Is it the mixed martial arts mesage board?
You're training to be a cage fighter, aren't you?
Quote from: phattymatty on January 30, 2006, 01:21:06 PM
Is it the mixed martial arts mesage board?
You're training to be a cage fighter, aren't you?
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh(http://www.timandshawna.net/tim_movies/napoleon_dynamite/napoleon_dynamite01.jpg)
just google the usernames mentioned in the post, Son of Tydeus
Dramatic farewell speeches from attention whores rule
Quote from: BigEd76 on January 30, 2006, 01:27:55 PM
Dramatic farewell speeches from attention whores rule
Not as much as open letters to Dave Montgomery on PhilliesPhans do.
:-D
i'm thinking of buying a new car. anyone have any ideas?
As an attention whore who has previously quit this messageboard in a huff, I have to say that at least I didn't make a big "NonedumBa is calling me a child molestor and so I'm quitting" diatribe.
I rule.
Quote from: BigEd76 on January 30, 2006, 01:27:55 PM
Dramatic farewell speeches from attention whores rule
You have to have some good ones you can find from the 82,458 message boards you frequent.
I'm having deep psychological and emotional problems. Also, I'm contemplating murdering many people including myself. I think I would like to get some advice on this situation from a football message board and all of my super duper close friends therein. Can you guys help me?
stab yourself in the throat.
Quote from: Wingspan on January 30, 2006, 01:16:33 PM
it took me 10 seconds to find the board.
Same here. And the format sucks.
Quote from: rjs246 on January 30, 2006, 01:32:11 PM
I'm having deep psychological and emotional problems. Also, I'm contemplating murdering many people including myself. I think I would like to get some advice on this situation from a football message board and all of my super duper close friends therein. Can you guys help me?
We're here for you. I can't promise the quality of our advice, but I can promise a high likelihood of hilarity and uselessness. Does that work if you? If so, share.
Quote from: rjs246 on January 30, 2006, 01:32:11 PM
I'm having deep psychological and emotional problems. Also, I'm contemplating murdering many people including myself. I think I would like to get some advice on this situation from a football message board and all of my super duper close friends therein. Can you guys help me?
Sure. What do you need? Bullets? Bus fare?
I like to eat children. Is this weird? Please don't judge.
Eating them is better than feeding them.
just wondering, why the kid hatred?
It's people hatred, really. They're just little people, so they get the hate too. Also, the hate is encouraged by all the idiots in this world who worship children, as though they aren't going to grow up to be dirtbag people.
[dio]over population, self-important parents, education/tax costs for those who don't even have children, general surliness, etc[/dio]
gotcha, it really boils down to guilt by association
That and shame. Shame for not having the courage to take myself out.
Quote from: Diomedes on January 30, 2006, 01:42:03 PM
That and shame. Shame for not having the courage to take myself out.
well, we're all behind you, if that helps build your courage
Awesome, thanks.
Quote from: rjs246 on January 30, 2006, 01:34:31 PM
I like to eat children. Is this weird? Please don't judge.
It's fine. You'll feel better about it if you post it to grouphug.
Quote from: Diomedes on January 30, 2006, 01:37:19 PM
It's people hatred, really. They're just little people, so they get the hate too. Also, the hate is encouraged by all the idiots in this world who worship children, as though they aren't going to grow up to be dirtbag people.
I'm truly hopeful mine won't. No guarantees, mind you. But cautiously optimistic about the prospect.
hot rod hunt just joined that board.
what % of message board retirees never actually return
Quote from: mhunt on January 30, 2006, 01:48:58 PM
hot rod hunt just joined that board.
Make sure to put the Oldsmobuick Intrigue in your sig. You'll get mad board rep, yo.
Quote from: ice grillin you on January 30, 2006, 01:49:13 PM
what % of message board retirees never actually return
i've left message boards and not gone back to them.
i never left with a huffing blaze of glory mind you....just stopped posting.
i used to get pissed at things, but that was years ago, and it didnt take too long to figure how how retarted it was to let the stuff bother me.
Quote from: Sun_Mo on January 30, 2006, 01:53:37 PM
Quote from: ice grillin you on January 30, 2006, 01:49:13 PM
what % of message board retirees never actually return
-90%
I'd say it's closer to 10%, and I'm assuming you misread the question.
i think that's a negative ninety percent. der.
Quote from: rjs246 on January 30, 2006, 01:59:17 PM
i think that's a negative ninety percent. der.
double der.
Not picking up on that immediately makes me hate myself so much.
And rightfully so. You should start a thread about your self-loathing. I'm sure you'll get some life-affirming responses.
Does this guy post here?
(http://www.seanet.com/~rod/images/StuartSmalley.jpg)
Quote from: FFatPatt on January 30, 2006, 01:31:55 PM
Quote from: BigEd76 on January 30, 2006, 01:27:55 PM
Dramatic farewell speeches from attention whores rule
You have to have some good ones you can find from the 82,458 message boards you frequent.
Not really, because they come back every time... ;D
That doesn't mean the speeches aren't preserved for our amusement.
FF, I have my images turned off at work but I really hope that's a picture of Smacky.
Quote from: rjs246 on January 30, 2006, 02:24:23 PM
FF, I have my images turned off at work but I really hope that's a picture of Smacky.
Stuart Smalley. Same difference.
Quote from: rjs246 on January 30, 2006, 02:24:23 PM
FF, I have my images turned off at work but I really hope that's a picture of Smacky.
Smacky would threaten a lawsuit if his picture was posted here.
Trust me.
:-D
QuoteThis will be my first and last post. In fact, I will no longer visit this site as I refuse to socialize with liberal elitists. So go rent your Susan Sarandon movies, sit down and watch Martin Sheen on the WW, go buy yourself a Dixie Chicks CD and have a great time. Before I leave, let me ask just one question. Do you think we could get away with posting on this website in Saddam's Iraq? I'm sure we could not and that is all the reason I need for war.
QuoteMany of you will probably welcome my departure, which is final. You will be glad to not see my postings anymore. To that, I will only say, do you gain enjoyment arguing only with yourselves and people similarly like-minded? Or will you find out that with a smaller and smaller number of contrary thinkers, that discussion here becomes dull and tiresome? Think only that you have contributed to an environment so intolerant, that it has become stagnant.
Quotedon't care if i get banned because i really have lost interest in posting here anymore. i know outside topics are allowed, but nothing constructive gets done anymore. all that ever happens is one side says something and the other side yells they're wrong and it just goes back and forth. very few of the political posters actually argue about anything, and it is pretty bad that the true purpose of this board is being overshadowed by a minor portion of it. i still do not see why a separate forum for political threads can not be created. it would seem to me that its not worth alienating people who come here for baseball mainly to cater to a crowd who almost exclusively use the board for other things. all they ever come up with is "just don't read it" , well its hard not to read the thread titles when there are about 10 of them everyday.
so to those of you who understand what i am talking about, and aren't too far in the forest to see the trees...good luck and good bye
QuoteYou guys are way too cynicall and melodramatic. I feel that nothing good enough for you guys anymore. Ok, i'm leaving, i can't stand this place anymore. I know everyone will just discount what i wrote as ignorance, insulance, or stupidity. So i won't even read the responces. Feel free to write any kind of condescending replies you wish i really don't care.
Yeah, but those posts are from a forum that got retired, too.
None of those are from EMB :)
I can't believe no one posted NB's final tirade here.
That was some funny shtein.
:-D
Quote from: Jerome99RIP on January 30, 2006, 02:44:07 PM
I can't believe no one posted NB's final tirade here.
That was some funny shtein.
:-D
You remember it? I don't. I must have missed it.
Quote from: hbionic on January 30, 2006, 02:44:47 PM
Quote from: Jerome99RIP on January 30, 2006, 02:44:07 PM
I can't believe no one posted NB's final tirade here.
That was some funny shtein.
:-D
You remember it? I don't. I must have missed it.
You don't remember him caterwauling about how "dark" this place had become?
I don't remember his goodbye speech, but from his pic on EMB, he appeared to be more wigga than igy...
NB? He had a pic on the emb? I always pictured a heavier hispanic dude. You know...those big guys with the sissy attitudes.
Posting pictures of yourself online is always a great idea.
(http://groups.msn.com/_Secure/0UQAAABkZAx6qDnx2K6vMK3UGaWDctXdhVuYMDYNxoP38FjdxHxAOju83pu2UXbg05FvOSP2GwI7sXH3NscGFfWLIO8Yj9CSO0WWYnSg4vAaR07qOJC0I4bSx8nqvkAlZ/NoneBettaThanDuce.BMP?dc=4675362578545155157)
You know, I don't usually get riled up because of online stuff. But, man, NB nearly drove me to kill when it came to CFFFL. Drove me totally nuts.
:-D
What a dorky thread.
What's weird is, NB was never like that on the EMB.
When I started posting here, his posting style was completely different.
Take heed... this is what happens when you allow religious fanaticism to rule your life.
The Online Disinhibition Effect (http://www.rider.edu/~suler/psycyber/disinhibit.html)
Quote from: BigEd76 on January 30, 2006, 03:25:40 PM
(http://groups.msn.com/_Secure/0UQAAABkZAx6qDnx2K6vMK3UGaWDctXdhVuYMDYNxoP38FjdxHxAOju83pu2UXbg05FvOSP2GwI7sXH3NscGFfWLIO8Yj9CSO0WWYnSg4vAaR07qOJC0I4bSx8nqvkAlZ/NoneBettaThanDuce.BMP?dc=4675362578545155157)
Next, someone will tell me that hbionic is really Canadian......
Wow...that is totally not what I pictued him like.
Perhaps his generic Republican suit was at the dry cleaners that day.
Quote from: General_Failure on January 30, 2006, 03:57:13 PM
Perhaps his generic Republican suit was at the dry cleaners that day.
He only wears that when he goes door to door with tracts and vials of holy water.
Quote from: General_Failure on January 30, 2006, 03:42:56 PM
The Online Disinhibition Effect (http://www.rider.edu/~suler/psycyber/disinhibit.html)
So wait, are you saying that people aren't really like this in real life? That people act differently on a message board than in real life? This isn't reality?! Inconceivable.
Quote from: hbionic on January 30, 2006, 03:55:20 PM
Wow...that is totally not what I pictued him like.
That's not going to ruin the fantasy for you, is it?
Quote from: rjs246 on January 30, 2006, 04:13:17 PM
Quote from: General_Failure on January 30, 2006, 03:42:56 PM
The Online Disinhibition Effect (http://www.rider.edu/~suler/psycyber/disinhibit.html)
So wait, are you saying that people aren't really like this in real life? That people act differently on a message board than in real life? This isn't reality?! Inconceivable.
It's true. In real life, Dio is a conformist and I hate America.
he is a conformist. working for corporate america, paying bills, and still alive, just like the rest of us ;)
Fine, then in real life Dio is a God fearing Christian conservative.
Gems like this post, entitled "Today has been, bar none, hands down, THE MOST EMBARRASING, day of my life.", are the reason I visit this other board from time to time:
QuoteSo I go to lunch with a co-worker, nothing out of the ordinary. Sit down, have my meal, talk about work, usual stuff. At lunch I notice a commercial for the "Spa Spin", I turn to the co-worker, "That looks pretty cool, I think I'm going to buy one when we get back to the office." We finish our lunch, pay, and head out to his car, a nice, shiny black 05 Acura TL. On the way back, we're talking, joking around, when I feel a fart brewing. I turn to him, "I'm sorry to do it to you man, but..." I clench my fists in front of me, pull them into my chest for effect, and proceed to push out the fart. A fraction of a second later, I realize that there is nothing gaseous coming out, and that I had just pooped on myself. I immediately clench up, trying to stem the flow, but it was too late. I feel the squishy, wet poo in my pants, and raise up off of his seat.
"UUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHH, oh my god, oh my god." This coupled with the look on my face let him know what had just happened.
"OH NO! You didn't! BWAHAHAHAAHAHHAA!" He starts laughing hysterically, while I'm sitting there in terror. I can't help it and start laughing hysterically too, which only forces my stomach to release another blast. So here we are, both laughing hysterically after I just pooped in his car, and the smell hits us. He rolls down his windows as we race back to the office, both laughing. I can't say anything except, "oh my god, I can't believe this is happening, I am soooooo sorry." over and over. We get to the office, he pulls right next to my car, and shuts off the engine.
"Can you please get out first, I don't want you to see this." I ask, unsure of just how foul the mess would be. He complies, and I try to get out without touching the seat. I get out, look down and see this huge wet spot of disgusting, thick, filtered diarrea sitting on his perforated leather seats. I scuttle towards my car (making sure to keep my back to him), and remember that I have a synthetic chamois in my trunk. I grab the chamois, and see a half empty bottle of water and grab that, scuttle back over and desperately try to mop up the mess in his seat. I do my best, and tell him I promise to clean it up better later. I tell him that I'm going home. "No prob man, I'll just tell the group that your Wife called and that you had to go home to take care of something."
So I take the Ziplock bag that the chamois was in, stick it on my seat, and squish down, and proceed to HAUL ASS the whole way home (about 30 miles) sitting in my own filth. The whole way back, I have to keep the windows down and the heater cranked to avoid the nauseating smell. I get home, run up to the bathroom, strip, and proceed to unleash the rest of the liquid fury lurking within. I hop in the shower and try to scrub myself raw to get everything off. I realize the irony that not an hour earlier I had been wanting to buy a motorized shower scrubber, and wished that I had it right then.
After the shower, I scramble to find something to wear, hoping I have something clean in the same colors so that nobody will notice - black slacks and a black french cuff shirt. I realize that I had taken nearly all of my clothes to the cleaners this past weekend, and all I can scrounge up in my closet that's clean is a pair of Tan slacks and bright orange shirt, great. I throw it on, hop in the other car (I'll deal with the interior of the first car later), and haul ass back to work.
I try to sneak in undetected, and everybody that I pass looks at me and snickers. I get to my desk, and find a printout for coupons on Depends undergarments sitting on my keyboard. Great, "won't tell anybody" my ass. I guess I would have done the same thing in his shoes.
I swear, I will never, ever, ever, ever live this down. I'll never be able to give anybody a hard time about anything, because no matter what, I'm the guy who pooped in a co-workers car. I think I need to find a new job.
I nearly shat myself laughing.
Quoteproceed to unleash the rest of the liquid fury lurking within
That's funny.
Fake.
Quote from: rjs246 on January 30, 2006, 05:20:36 PM
Fake.
my first impression as well.
there is no way any dude is laughing when his passenger shoots liquid shtein all over his leather seat
Quote from: rjs246 on January 30, 2006, 05:20:36 PM
Fake.
Go ahead and search around. I was skeptical at first, but I think it's actually sadly legit.
Fake.
Was he wearing a skirt? And is he new to this world. I think as men...we all know when its a fart...and when its almost shtein.
I also vote for fake.
Like sun mo said...who laughs at a guy shteinting in his car let alone some douchy co-worker. I'd kick my friends out in a heart beat.
1. My guess is that FF's secret forum is an Audi forum, right?
2. I remember NB and I used to talk with him a lot on the EMB and on here. But I always wondered why he ended up like a cyber version of Billy Graham. He was a cool dude until he got on his Jesus kick.
3. That story is funny as hell. Might be fake, but still funny imagining it.
fake.
NB was fake too.
still fake, hbionic is right...you KNOW when it's a fart. and if anything escapes during a fart...it's going to be a M & M size...or at MOST a walnut size nugget. you know when it's a liquid batch brewing.
Quote from: Wingspan on January 30, 2006, 07:24:11 PM
you know when it's a liquid batch brewing.
Yep. If I feel something like that and I know that trying to fart is going to come with a 70% chance of showers then I just hold it in. It's just not worth it. Besides, why would anyone want to waste an explosive ass buttery fart like that in the car? Save it for the toilet so you can hear the echo!
Quote from: PhillyPhreak54 on January 30, 2006, 07:01:59 PM
1. My guess is that FF's secret forum is an Audi forum, right?
I don't drive an Audi.
Volkswagen?
Freddie = Scion
I drive a Mitsubishi.
No, seriously. Just ask the peeps at the Panthers game in 2003.
Oh, you were there, Phreak.
Moron. :-D
:-D
I remember that. But I also remember that you had a car that you talked a lot about when you first moved down to NC. I thought it was an Audi or something like that.
Yeah, thankfully got over my car obsession. Thems things are all money pits.
I will never buy a brand new car again, and I'm driving my current one into the ground.
Fake.
Frickin rice burner.