So we live in an old farm house. There is about 100 acres of fields behind us. Occasionally spiders get in. Spiders don't bother me. I usually chase them into a glass and let them go back outside.
I am sleeping last night. Since we don't have kids we sleep naked. I wake up because I feel something walking across my stomach. I flip the covers back and a wolf spider is on me. I knock it off me onto the floor. Wolf spiders can give a pretty nasty bite. I get up and the wife is like "What's wrong" and I tell her "Nothing, go back to sleep."
I looked around and I couldn't find the spider. I don't want it to happen again. Should I warn her? Should I spray our bedroom? Should I wear some underwear to protect the boys?
(http://www.ento.psu.edu/extension/factsheets/Spider/Lycosasp.jpg)
(Wolf Spider)
We get our house, outside and inside, treated every 3 months against insects/spiders.
Quote from: Yeti on August 22, 2005, 04:26:26 PM
So we live in an old farm house. There is about 100 acres of fields behind us. Occasionally spiders get in. Spiders don't bother me. I usually chase them into a glass and let them go back outside.
I am sleeping last night. Since we don't have kids we sleep naked. I wake up because I feel something walking across my stomach. I flip the covers back and a wolf spider is on me. I knock it off me onto the floor. Wolf spiders can give a pretty nasty bite. I get up and the wife is like "What's wrong" and I tell her "Nothing, go back to sleep."
I looked around and I couldn't find the spider. I don't want it to happen again. Should I warn her? Should I spray our bedroom? Should I wear some underwear to protect the boys?
(http://www.ento.psu.edu/extension/factsheets/Spider/Lycosasp.jpg)
(Wolf Spider)
Yeti, coming from a person bit by one of those bastiches when I was a kid on camping trip. Don't chance it. Easily the most excrutiating pain I've ever been in. They aren't poisonous, but like a tarantula (sp?) they have a nasty set of fangs. They are supposedly shy and run from confrontation, but regardless, I'd do whatever to keep them out of my house.
(http://dine.sanjuan.k12.ut.us/heritage/land/animals/bugs/images/wolf_spider.jpg)
I bet your wearing some clothes over the family Jewels now Yeti.
If I never see one of those in my life, I'll be a happy girl.
If you wear clothing to bed, Mrs. Yeti is gonna want to know what's up. So you'll have to tell her about 'ol eight legs.
Poison sucks. Don't spray.
Just move. It isn't worth it.
Yeah, thanks for that Murp. I'll be seeing that all night long.
Is this at the new house or the old one? If it's the old one then who cares? Just don't mention it when you try and sell. :D
The old one. I just got to dodge wolfie for 16 days. I think I should warm the Mrs.
Don't they seek warm moist areas?
I once read that unless you live in Antarctica, you're never more than three feet away from a spider.
Pleasent dreams.
Probably. So you might wanna cover up your stink hole.
I farging HATE spiders. I kill every one I see. Creepy little fargers.
Quote from: SSgt PSN on August 22, 2005, 06:10:45 PM
Probably. So you might wanna cover up your stink hole.
You think he will head for the septic system?
He'll probably head for the darkest corner of your bedroom. They dig the dark, cool places.
Quote from: PhillyPhreak54 on August 22, 2005, 06:16:50 PM
He'll probably head for the darkest corner of your bedroom. They dig the dark, cool places.
Its dark under the blankets. :paranoid
Looks like you're going to have to sleep in winter clothes with no blankets. I'd have the bug guy in the house spraying every chemical available and I'd sleep with a gas mask if I had to...creepy little fargers.
Whatever you do, DON'T step on it or smash it. Wolf spiders carry their egg sacks, and the spiderlings when they're first born. If you step on a new mom- those little spiders go EVERYWHERE!
We get our house treated often, since I live in an area of a lot of black widows.
Quote from: Geowhizzer on August 22, 2005, 06:56:59 PM
We get our house treated often, since I live in an area of a lot of black widows.
That's so racist. Who cares what color the widows are? They just lost their spouse you insensitive prick!
if anyone here buys real christmas trees watchout. I was about 17 when we got a christmas tree that my dad brother and i cut down from a TreeFarm or as NB would say a Concentration Camp for Tree's 8) . My brother and i woke up 2 days after christmas and were walking in the house and noticed these little black lines running across the table suspended in the air. We got curious and went over and walked into the lines and looked down and we had hundreds of ants on us. The whole room was covered in ants the size of a pencil point. The Exterminator after 8 trips still couldnt kill off all spiders. The worst part was looking down at them all over you. Yeti they are only gonna get worse when you are living in the woods. Get a fogger for your first week and Bomb the hell outof you new cabin. :evil
Put some rotten meat out to attract flies, then the spiders will leave you alone. :)
Quote from: Seabiscuit36 on August 22, 2005, 07:21:56 PM
if anyone here buys real christmas trees watchout. I was about 17 when we got a christmas tree that my dad brother and i cut down from a TreeFarm or as NB would say a Concentration Camp for Tree's 8) .
:-D
Quote from: PhillyPhreak54 on August 22, 2005, 06:12:47 PM
I farging HATE spiders. I kill every one I see. Creepy little fargers.
Same here. I'll go out of my way to kill those nasty things. I'd rather have to wear OFF every day of my life to keep bugs of me than live with spiders.
Quote from: SSgt PSN on August 22, 2005, 07:18:26 PM
Quote from: Geowhizzer on August 22, 2005, 06:56:59 PM
We get our house treated often, since I live in an area of a lot of black widows.
That's so racist. Who cares what color the widows are? They just lost their spouse you insensitive prick!
:-D You really are Sassy tonight!
Spiders don't really bother me, though I would definately get freaked out if a wolf spider was on me. The only creatures that really scare me are snakes and sharks. I would love to go shark fishing and then be able to beat a shark in the head with a 20lb sledge. :poison
get a shoe (http://www.spiderzrule.com/spiderphotos/huntsman241003.jpg) :paranoid
Jesus Christ, that thing's hideous, how'd you stay and look at it long enough to identify that thing?! I would have ran out of the house, drive about 2 miles, pull the car over, and start crying.
:-D
Quote from: FreakisaKearseWord on August 22, 2005, 11:11:12 PM
Jesus Christ, that thing's hideous, how'd you stay and look at it long enough to identify that thing?! I would have ran out of the house, drive about 2 miles, pull the car over, and start crying.
:-D :-D
Me too.
And every little thing I feel rubbing against me I'd think it was Big Bad Wolfie coming back to bite me. Farg that shtein.
I don't care what purpose spiders serve in the cycle of life, but I'd like them to be eliminated. I'll deal with moths and flies.
Quote from: Geowhizzer on August 22, 2005, 06:56:59 PM
Whatever you do, DON'T step on it or smash it. Wolf spiders carry their egg sacks, and the spiderlings when they're first born. If you step on a new mom- those little spiders go EVERYWHERE!
wow. Yeti, you are in trouble. Looks like you need a flame thrower to get this sucka!
Day 2.
I went home and looked in the dark areas of the bedroom. I think I found Sarges hiding place in the back of the closet. There was a half eaten cheese sandwich and a Sears catalog turned to the "Boys" section. I used a broom hoping to flush out the spider. No luck.
Everytime I would start to fall asleep I could feel something moving around. The wife (I told her about it) said I was feeling things. I told her I would like to be, she said "Go to sleep." Just as well. Kinda hard to be sexy when you are both wearing sweats. That little bastich is hiding somewhere and now he (she) is cramping my style.
Creepy little farger.
i saw a wolf spider...that was almost tarantula size on our deck...acouple years ago...i got a picture of it. ill try to find it. i see one of those spiders, especially inside ill kill the sum bitch. we have spiders on our property that are called garden spiders...they are badass looking...when i was a kid i used to throw large grasshoppers in there webs and watch the spiders go to town on them. :evil
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v101/ananumuss/spider10.jpg)
Mussa, thats exactly the one that was on me. I tryed to find a picture of it but I couldn't.
Hey.
You didn't let that thing loose in my house did you?
Quote from: General_Failure on August 22, 2005, 07:21:58 PM
Put some rotten meat out to attract flies, then the spiders will leave you alone. :)
After you collect on Sarge's ex, you should have plenty of rotting meat to go around.
yeti that pic is of a garden spider....not a wolf. no man i didn't let it loose, but that half-eaten cheese sandwhich is mine i think.
don't sound to dangerous(but i sure as hell wouldn't want that little farger crawling around my nuts or my womans body)
Quote
Black and Yellow Argiope or "Garden Spider / Banana Spider"
A very large common spider in North America. Usually hangs in webs with its head facing the ground. It is brightly colored. Its venom is a neurotoxin similar to that of the black widow. However, its venom is not near as potent. Its bite causes local pain and redness with blisters forming. This bite usually resolves within 24 hours except for the bite mark.
Quote from: mussa on August 23, 2005, 10:07:55 AM
yeti that pic is of a garden spider....not a wolf.
:-D No wonder I couldn't find a picture of it.
Nice work there Jeff Corwin.
Quote from: Yeti on August 23, 2005, 09:52:37 AM
Day 2.
I went home and looked in the dark areas of the bedroom. I think I found Sarges hiding place in the back of the closet. There was a half eaten cheese sandwich and a Sears catalog turned to the "Boys" section. I used a broom hoping to flush out the spider. No luck.
Everytime I would start to fall asleep I could feel something moving around. The wife (I told her about it) said I was feeling things. I told her I would like to be, she said "Go to sleep." Just as well. Kinda hard to be sexy when you are both wearing sweats. That little bastich is hiding somewhere and now he (she) is cramping my style.
Creepy little farger.
Did you also find a plastic nose, a monkey, and a silver glove? :-D
Quote from: FreakisaKearseWord on August 23, 2005, 10:12:03 AM
Quote from: Yeti on August 23, 2005, 09:52:37 AM
Day 2.
I went home and looked in the dark areas of the bedroom. I think I found Sarges hiding place in the back of the closet. There was a half eaten cheese sandwich and a Sears catalog turned to the "Boys" section. I used a broom hoping to flush out the spider. No luck.
Everytime I would start to fall asleep I could feel something moving around. The wife (I told her about it) said I was feeling things. I told her I would like to be, she said "Go to sleep." Just as well. Kinda hard to be sexy when you are both wearing sweats. That little bastich is hiding somewhere and now he (she) is cramping my style.
Creepy little farger.
Did you also find a plastic nose, a monkey, and a silver glove with shtein and blood all over it? :-D
fixed
Quote from: mussa on August 23, 2005, 10:36:24 AM
Quote from: FreakisaKearseWord on August 23, 2005, 10:12:03 AM
Quote from: Yeti on August 23, 2005, 09:52:37 AM
Day 2.
I went home and looked in the dark areas of the bedroom. I think I found Sarges hiding place in the back of the closet. There was a half eaten cheese sandwich and a Sears catalog turned to the "Boys" section. I used a broom hoping to flush out the spider. No luck.
Everytime I would start to fall asleep I could feel something moving around. The wife (I told her about it) said I was feeling things. I told her I would like to be, she said "Go to sleep." Just as well. Kinda hard to be sexy when you are both wearing sweats. That little bastich is hiding somewhere and now he (she) is cramping my style.
Creepy little farger.
Did you also find a plastic nose, a monkey, and a silver glove with shtein and blood all over it? :-D
fixed
Erm...I was referring to the King [ Sha'mona! ], not OJ :-D
yea so was I...think about it :evil
>:D
Some tree huggers try and tell ya that spiders are good, they eat bugs, don't kill em. Farg that. Nothing sucks more than walking into a web you didn't see and freakin out imagining the little critter is on ya somewhere. My common test for bugs, fish, pets, etc, is simple. If they were as big as you are, would they eat you? Spiders would wrap you up and slowly suck the blood from your veins, leading you to a painful, slow, and semi concious end. You must kill it. (BTW, most all dogs pass this test, cats on the other hand do not.)
The sucker you saw in the bedroom is probably not alone. He or she has comer inside to provide a stable environ for hatching eggs, which may number in the hundreds. Right now her appetite is ravenous, and she is probably overly protective and agressive. If she has not tucked her youngins in the far corners of your sheets already, you are lucky. At night she will most likely be drawn to the moist warmth of your breath escaping. Don't be suprised if you open your eyes to find her hovering over you from the ceiling. Just keep your mouth shut while sleeping and you'll be fine.
Reidme = Stephen King
Yeah, no shtein. I'm so totally sleeping in a bubble tonight.
Quote from: Reidme on August 23, 2005, 07:46:47 PM
Some tree huggers try and tell ya that spiders are good, they eat bugs, don't kill em. Farg that. Nothing sucks more than walking into a web you didn't see and freakin out imagining the little critter is on ya somewhere. My common test for bugs, fish, pets, etc, is simple. If they were as big as you are, would they eat you? Spiders would wrap you up and slowly suck the blood from your veins, leading you to a painful, slow, and semi concious end. You must kill it. (BTW, most all dogs pass this test, cats on the other hand do not.)
The sucker you saw in the bedroom is probably not alone. He or she has comer inside to provide a stable environ for hatching eggs, which may number in the hundreds. Right now her appetite is ravenous, and she is probably overly protective and agressive. If she has not tucked her youngins in the far corners of your sheets already, you are lucky. At night she will most likely be drawn to the moist warmth of your breath escaping. Don't be suprised if you open your eyes to find her hovering over you from the ceiling. Just keep your mouth shut while sleeping and you'll be fine.
I nominate this one for post of the year.
Finally, competition for the drooling coma smiley post!
Quote from: General_Failure on August 23, 2005, 10:52:45 PM
Finally, competition for the drooling coma smiley post!
Worthy competition, I think. Do you disagree?
This is gonna be the best POTY contest ever!
:drool :drool :drool
Compete with that........IF YOU DARE!
Quote from: General_Failure on August 23, 2005, 10:59:45 PM
This is gonna be the best POTY contest ever!
Nice to see you taking the lead on running this one,
Big Brother. Who says you're anti-social?
Quote from: Diomedes on August 23, 2005, 11:01:36 PM
Nice to see you taking the lead on running this one, Big Brother. Who says you're anti-social?
His shrink.
I said best, not "worst contest since NB tried to run a FFL."
Quote from: Reidme on August 23, 2005, 07:46:47 PM
Some tree huggers try and tell ya that spiders are good, they eat bugs, don't kill em. Farg that. Nothing sucks more than walking into a web you didn't see and freakin out imagining the little critter is on ya somewhere. My common test for bugs, fish, pets, etc, is simple. If they were as big as you are, would they eat you? Spiders would wrap you up and slowly suck the blood from your veins, leading you to a painful, slow, and semi concious end. You must kill it. (BTW, most all dogs pass this test, cats on the other hand do not.)
The sucker you saw in the bedroom is probably not alone. He or she has comer inside to provide a stable environ for hatching eggs, which may number in the hundreds. Right now her appetite is ravenous, and she is probably overly protective and agressive. If she has not tucked her youngins in the far corners of your sheets already, you are lucky. At night she will most likely be drawn to the moist warmth of your breath escaping. Don't be suprised if you open your eyes to find her hovering over you from the ceiling. Just keep your mouth shut while sleeping and you'll be fine.
:-D Jesus. Like I wasn't worried enough.
Quote from: Reidme on August 23, 2005, 07:46:47 PM
Some tree huggers try and tell ya that spiders are good, they eat bugs, don't kill em. Farg that. Nothing sucks more than walking into a web you didn't see and freakin out imagining the little critter is on ya somewhere. My common test for bugs, fish, pets, etc, is simple. If they were as big as you are, would they eat you? Spiders would wrap you up and slowly suck the blood from your veins, leading you to a painful, slow, and semi concious end. You must kill it. (BTW, most all dogs pass this test, cats on the other hand do not.)
The sucker you saw in the bedroom is probably not alone. He or she has comer inside to provide a stable environ for hatching eggs, which may number in the hundreds. Right now her appetite is ravenous, and she is probably overly protective and agressive. If she has not tucked her youngins in the far corners of your sheets already, you are lucky. At night she will most likely be drawn to the moist warmth of your breath escaping. Don't be suprised if you open your eyes to find her hovering over you from the ceiling. Just keep your mouth shut while sleeping and you'll be fine.
Kick ass.
Heh, heh. Learned what I know about spiders from horror movies and divorce court. :evil
link (http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20050901/od_uk_nm/oukoe_uk_germany_spiders)
QuoteBERLIN (Reuters) - A German woman laid waste to her family home by setting fire to it as she tried to kill spiders in a garage with a can of hairspray and a cigarette lighter.
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Police in the western town of Zuelpich said that when the aerosol failed to finish them off, the 34-year-old woman tried to burn them with the lighter. However, this set the area she had just sprayed on fire and the blaze spread to a hedge.
"It was a series of unfortunate events which led to the damage," a police spokesman said on Thursday.
"She tried to put the fire out with a garden hose, but couldn't. Instead her semi-detached house next to the hedge caught fire. It's now uninhabitable."
Fire-fighters managed to extinguish the blaze and save the neighbouring house, which sustained broken windows and some charring. The spokesman estimated the total cost of the damage at well over 100,000 euros (68,000 pounds). No one was hurt.
"The family have had to look for somewhere else to stay," he said. "The spiders are gone though -- that problem was solved."
:-D
(http://arizona.indymedia.org/uploads/camel_spider_in_iraq-soldier-jpg.jpg)
Jesus Christ. That gives me the willies. :poison
That pic is really the only good thing to come out of this war.
Spiderporn.
Eh...they're technically not spiders. Technically.
Are those things real? Or just rubber?
And if they're real, what the hell are they?
They're called Camel Spiders and they like to eat babies.
lol...no they don't. They are ugly fargers, though. No doubt about that.
Here's an attempt to seperate fact from myth: http://www.snopes.com/photos/bugs/camelspider.asp
Still some ugly sumbitches. I hate the little spiders. If I encountered one with 5-6" legs I'd scream like a bitch.
murp posted a thread with pics to those things along time ago.
QuoteThey're called Camel Spiders and they like to eat babies.
Mike Tyson likes to eat babies too. Coincidence? I think not.
Quote from: PhillyPhreak54 on January 26, 2006, 09:08:09 AM
Still some ugly sumbitches. I hate the little spiders. If I encountered one with 5-6" legs I'd scream like a bitch.
You think those are bad? You should see camel toe spiders....
Quote from: Zanshin on January 26, 2006, 09:23:47 AM
Quote from: PhillyPhreak54 on January 26, 2006, 09:08:09 AM
Still some ugly sumbitches. I hate the little spiders. If I encountered one with 5-6" legs I'd scream like a bitch.
You think those are bad? You should see camel toe spiders....
(http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/1645000/images/_1646912_tongueruler300.jpg)
Man, that dude's tongue is longer than my.........uh finger. Yeah, that's it. It's longer than my finger. :paranoid