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[ice grillin you]

king of cranial lumps

i used an aardvark as a vacum cleaner in my car once...he pooped six dollars in quarters two days later

[hbionic]

i was at the grocery store the other day (no self checkout).  it was the middle of the day so the checkout lady didn't have a bagger.  a guy was in front of me and as she was ringing up his items, he just stood there.  now, if that's me, and she doesn't have a bagger, i am bagging my own items to 1) be nice and 2) make the whole thing go faster.

so, she's done with the stuff, he pays with his card, she waits for the receipt, the whole time, 10 farging items are sitting there.  i almost bagged the shtein myself to make a point, that's how much it bothered me.  then she finally started to bag the stuff and he just kinda turned his back to avoid his shame. 

i hope he's dead.

 

[MDS]

star jones and joy behar love each other

"Last Friday was my 44th birthday, but my boobs still think they're 20," Jones said - and that's when Behar heard enough. "OK, Star. That's enough about you. On to us. 'Bye," she snapped. Behar was bleeped when she added "Keep your [breasts] perky!" in a mock-cheerful voice. "I'm glad to see you haven't changed," Jones shot back. "Even today, you are still a bitch," she said before the call was abruptly cut off.

joys like every mom ive met, so i have a soft spot for her cause i love jewish mothers. star is pretty much the devil.

[ice grillin you]

spring is in the air today....not long before i spend my lunches back outside and just watch stuff bounce for an hour

business women mmmmmmmm

[MURP]

[MDS]

I was in the store the other day and I watched a young girl trying on clothes, showing her abdomen. Her mother was trying to talk to her about not being inappropriately luring. I said, 'Gee that would look much nicer with a camisole under.' Her mother walked away, and I said to the girl, 'I'd like to give you a two-minute conversation about sex.' Young people talk to me about what to do if they're being pressed for sex? I tell them (what I believe): oral sex is a hundred times safer than vaginal or anal sex. If you're in a situation where you cannot get out of sex, offer a blow job. I'm not embarrassed to tell them."

-Sharon Stone

[rjs246]

Thank god Sharon Stone is around to dish out sage advice to the children of strangers.

[ice grillin you]

haha

she did not say that

[MDS]

my dorky hollywood websites never lie

[PhillyPhreak54]

Is that what she told Joe Pesci in Casino?

Good thread.

I don't hate the self-checkout lines. I go to Giants and I always use them. I hate dealing with the retarded/rude people who run the regular checkouts. Let me check out my own shtein and get on my way.

[MDS]

hey maria. HEY MARIA

nsfw

[MDS]

who has the balls to do that? its erin andrews, sideline reporter for espn. yes shes hot.

[MURP]

who has the balls to do that?  apparently an inbred from Iowa. 

[PhillyGirl]

You all missed the obvious.

That's his sister.

[MadMarchHare]

It's Iowa, not W Virginia.