Uh....kids 'n shtein

[hbionic]

I'm finishing some online courses to become an AYSO soccer coach. My little girl is playing U-8 (She's 6, she's gonna get her ass handed to her). The funny part is that most of my experience with soccer involves a television or using a turbo button.

I'm sure I'm going to turn them off from sports after I'm done with them.

Anyone else, done this? Any tips/pointers?

[Zanshin]

I coached football for 3 years and baseball for 6. I stopped coaching football a couple of years before my son stopped playing, because I couldn't deal with the other football coaches whom were just ridiculous screaming douchebags...to 7 year olds. In baseball, the coaches were fine, but the parents were douchebags.

I had parents who would threaten to take their kids home if they weren't going to pitch that day (bye, don't come back). I had one father who took his kid's bat after a game and throw it in the trash ("If you're not going to hit the ball, you don't need this." The kid was 3 for 4 that day. Dick.). I had parents tell me their kid (future hall of famers, all of them) should play all of the time and the kids who were worse, shouldn't ever see the field. Because that's the way kids learn, right?

Most of the kids were fine, and I'm glad I did it overall. If my kid was still playing, I'd probably still be coaching in some capacity. But Football dropped for him first because it was a RIDICULOUS time commitment. At 8 years old, they were starting in August, practicing 5 days a week for about 5 hours a day, with games on the weekends. It was just stupid. Baseball was less intense, but the practices were getting in the way of paying gigs. He made the choice to get paid to play guitar, which I thought was a solid one. When he's 70, he can still enjoy doing that...he wouldn't likely have played sports past high school...and fewer concussions ;-).

Long story short; have a little patience and you'll be fine. You'll look back on the time fondly...especially when you inevitably break and tell the parents to go farg themselves.

[Sgt PSN]

Dude, your kid has come a long way with his music since the first vids you started posting on FB. 

And Chuggie is about as athletic as a sloth and has probably has no business trying to teach anyone how to do the sports balls.  Also, I'm pretty sure he shouldn't be allowed within 500 feet of children.  Those are the court's words, not mine. 

[Susquehanna Birder]

I coached football for 3 years and baseball for 6. I stopped coaching football a couple of years before my son stopped playing, because I couldn't deal with the other football coaches whom were just ridiculous screaming douchebags...to 7 year olds. In baseball, the coaches were fine, but the parents were douchebags.

I was talking about this with somebody the other day. Of all the sports, football seems to draw the most obnoxious dads/wannabe coaches. Soccer, baseball, basketball, and whatever...generally there is yelling, but with the intent to correct and teach. Make it football, and everybody thinks they have to be the worst ahole drill sergeant in the hood.

Anyway, I've had a passing experience with the Positive Coaching Alliance (www.positivecoach.org). Many years ago, when they were first starting out, I attended a conference at Stanford. There's definitely a great feel to the approach, and it's not the "everybody gets a trophy" thing that people often complain about. These folks get coaches (and parents) to think about what is best for the kids, to develop their skills while also avoiding all of the negative crap that so many kids are exposed to.

[Rome]

I coached basketball in my 20s.  Kids were fine.  Parents were a farging nightmare.   I would highly recommend not doing it just for that reason alone. 

[Tomahawk]

Yeah, Rome, but things have changed in the 100 years since you coached

[hunt]

coaching is okay...i always make sure i'm assistant coach, not head coach.  that way i don't have to deal with ahole parents much. 

and there are plenty of ahole coaches too.  baseball is really bad, with coaches putting their kids at pitcher, shortstop, etc...and never subbing them out.  i've run into that almost every year.  this past year, the head coach's kid was the only player who didn't rotate around to other positions...the only one.     and i've seen more blatant examples on other teams.  mostly coaches who never played a sport in their lives.

[Butchers Bill]

I coached soccer for about five years with all of my boys.  Get yourself one of these:

https://www.amazon.com/AGPtEK-Football-Magnetic-Winning-strategy/dp/B014KTWB8A/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1501609820&sr=8-3&keywords=soccer+magnetic+board

Teach the kids to stay in their position (offense & defense, but also their side of the field).  If you can get them to do that you'll win a lot of games.

[Rome]

Yeah, Rome, but things have changed in the 100 years since you coached

They're worse now. 

[hbionic]

And Chuggie is about as athletic as a sloth and has probably has no business trying to teach anyone how to do the sports balls.

Wrong dick head. Not everyone is a quadriplegic like you when it comes to sports. Also, I got it reduced to 100 feet, and I can shout that far easily.

[hbionic]

Thanks Butcher's Bill. That looks good.

They'll be U8 girls.

I'm going to focus on fun, and hard work (trying to concentrate more on the ball on the field than the number of ladybugs flying around). I have no problem being strict...to parents. But I'm a sweetheart when it comes to little girls (except mine, I tend to be hard on her). But, fun, understand positions, and work on basic skills is the plan.

[Butchers Bill]

I hear you with the fun and skills thing, but don't discount winning.  I have found that there is nothing that'll turn a kid against a sport faster than losing, especially losing badly.  If the other teams kids go to the same school they'll get teased to no end, your kids will turn on the game quickly.

Oh, and F the parents...although I never really had a problem.  You are donating your time and effort...they don't like it they can volunteer next year.

[ice grillin you]

if you put your kids in soccer you are already a terrible parent and probably beyond any helpful advice

[hbionic]

I must be doing something right. Thanks IGY.

[PhillyPhreak54]

I'll echo the whole awful parents thing.

I coached baseball for awhile. I would like to do it again but I cannot deal with the parents. We were a 15-16yr old competitive league so no play requirements. I played the best at each position but had to deal with "why isn't my son playing - he's better than xxx" and also the whole second guessing in-game.

Nowadays I'm sure I'd have to deal with a whole bunch of mds type parents

"Hey! My kid Brody has a .800 WAR! Why isn't he playing?!" or "Jaxon has a 2.3876 xFIP! Put him out there!"